Featured Posts

Hostage to DoublethoughtHostage to Doublethought "It's too hard", he complains plaintively. "He, G-d, will understand. My son, he is a Rabbi. In Brooklyn. He is Lubavitch. (Here, he serenades me with the first few bars of...

Readmore

An Open Letter to Seminary Girls In a tradition dating back to the opening of the doors of the first seminary way back when in the fifties, the second week of Elul is host to an ingathering of exiles, so...

Readmore

Holiness in HaifaHoliness in Haifa Being a yeshiva student in Jerusalem is a wonderful experience. Aside from the learning, obviously, the people, places, and things to do never end. Indeed, I've fallen in...

Readmore

Goodbye, But Not For LongGoodbye, But Not For Long I and quite few other bochurim will be returning to Chutz La'aretz in just a few days. I can't wait for that flight. Not. I suppose I should be thankful though; Boruch...

Readmore

The Old Candy Man and The Candy StoreThe Old Candy Man and The Candy Store "Who can take tomorrow, dip it in a dream Separate the sorrow and collect up all the cream The Candy Man can, oh the Candy Man can The Candy Man can 'cause he mixes...

Readmore

You Know You’re in Eretz Yisroel When…

Posted by Yeshiva Guy | Posted in America, Eretz Yisroel, Yeshiva World | Posted on 12-08-2009

0

…The Local Druggie burns his hovel up, and random bochurim pitch in to help him out.

…The waitress at the restaurant informs you in no uncertain terms that she’ll take her tip in cash, (omits please).

…A lady give $100,000 to HU. The lady was homeless.

…You’re impressed by your Egged-mates’ shtatty looking Oyster Perpetual watch…until upon closer inspection you realize it says “Rol(od)ex” on it, not Rolex.

…Cars and motorcycles arbitrarily disobey traffic laws…why not?

…A random, fatherly type dude on the train scolds you, loudly, for putting your feet up- in a mussardike way. (Happened to friend).

…There, the Blacks speak Hebrew. Here, the Hebrews speak Black> (Israelis love showing off their poor command of ebonics).

…Ten men gather together to daven in a minyan…and no two belong to the same sect/denomination.

…There, the cars are BIG. Here, the cars are smallll.

The beggars wear tefillin.

…You walk into an innocent looking coffee house to get a Coke and use the internet, and the waiter tells you “It isn’t kosher here”.

…You go out on a shidduch, and have loads of fun. With the wrong girl.

…You’re bored at 2AM, but never fear…you can always go to the Kosel, and have a heart to heart with G-d.

…You can’t for the life of you figure out the parking lot’s pricing matrix…because it doesn’t make any sense.

…All around you, (chareidi) men are wearing tighter shirts than (chiloni) ladies.

…You can’t get over the fact that the three primary colors are not, in fact, BWB (Black, White,Black).

…People are rioting! Wait…why? No one is sure.

Free hot cocoa; no, not in camp, but at the Kosel.

Post a comment