Holiday Hurt
Posted by Yeshiva Guy | Posted in Blogovelt, Book Excerpts | Posted on 04-04-2010
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(Warning. This one hurts… proceed at your own risk.)
StillInShidduchim has this post about the pain of spending Yom Tov with the family.
I quote, partially:
And you wonder, if this is supposed to be a happy time, why am I in my room crying? Why do I feel so overworked? Why do I feel like I’m doing everything wrong, though I’m trying so hard? Why can’t I keep my cool? Why is this so hard?
Although I cannot pretend to share in the pain, I can extend my sympathy, and I/we do.
I would also be presumptuous enough to throw out a quote, if I may, from Lawrence Kelemen’s Permission to Believe, p 94, second footnote (located in the chapter on Tzaddik V’ra Lo).
“Logic notwithstanding, people cannot be expected to accept apparent Divine injustice peaceably. Someone who has experienced real agony- or supported someone who has- will take little comfort in intellectual explanations. Suffering afflicts the heart, and reason can only satisfy the mind…
… To someone in pain we can offer only compassion.”
Compassion offered.
That quote from Lawrence Keleman’s book is such a lesson in how to react to hearing other people’s pain. The natural response is often to point out how much worse it could be, or that this pain will only make you stronger and better…but the truth is, that when someone is in the painful situation, they just want to be heard and understood.
Compassion accepted. Thank you.
p.s. Nice title.
p.p.s. Should I read the book? I’ve meant to for years, never got around to it yet.